I never thought I would write about eating bulls balls, but here we go…
Let’s begin with a story:
About 6 weeks ago, Rusty Moore and I sat in a bar in Austin, TX, drinking, minding our own business…
You know, just hanging out and having a good time.
We had no idea what was about to enter our world…
So we’re sitting there, and up walks a waiter. He’s not from the bar, he’s from somewhere else. He’s calling out “Rusty! Anybody named Rusty in here?” He has a box in his hand…
Rusty turns around and accepts the box.
Then he opens it…
In the box sits 6 things. They look kinda like chicken nuggets, only more spherical.
They’re lightly breaded and fried.
Rusty asks the waiter, “what are these?”
He replies, “bulls balls. Someone at the restaurant next door sent them over for you.” (it was Kiefer and Matt Gill)
We asked him if they were good, and he said he wouldn’t eat them. Then he left.
And we were alone. With the balls.
So we did what any self-respecting guys would do…
We ate them.
Hyperbole aside, they weren’t that bad.
The fried, breaded exterior helped the taste.
But as Rusty said, picture – in your mind’s eye – what a testicle would taste like.
That’s what it tastes like.
They also have the consistency of play-doh. It was basically the after-taste that gets you.
Anyways, we both wondered, since we’re not regular testicle connoisseurs, if eating bulls balls has any health benefits, for example, boosting testosterone.
I dug up some of the health facts for animal testicles – let’s check it out…
- Serving Size: 100g (3.5oz)
- Calories: 135
- Protein: 26g
- Fat: 3g
- Cholesterol: 375mg
- Carbohydrates: 1g
- Sodium: 171mg
- Potassium: 380mg
- Iron: 6%
- Phospherous: 26%
- Magnesium: 3%
- Zinc: 13%
Or if you’re vegan, then you’re probably not eating bull balls anyway, but here are some vegan protein sources if you’re just on this page for fun:
Brown rice protein
Spirulina (algae-based) protein
My thoughts: based on this information, they are a relatively good source of Zinc, which is important for a healthy T level. So if you’d prefer to get your zinc from an alternative source, then you can tread with comfort knowing your testicles are helping you hit your daily zinc requirement.
They’re also a good source of animal protein, which is superior to plant protein in terms of hormonal benefits. However, they’re low in fat an carbohydrates so I would go elsewhere to get those macronutrients, because they are still important for supporting healthy T levels.
However, if you don’t have the balls (sorry) to try these, I recommend just sticking with supplements from the usual vendors.
My conclusion: Testicles do not taste good. They’re also not necessary for boosting your T, though they may carry some health benefits. If you’re looking to play a joke on your friend, buy them some fried bulls testicles at a restaurant next time you’re in Texas. It’ll be worth the good story.